Printable Purple Hearts

More retards:

New Line Cinema has removed the "printable Purple Hearts" that appeared in a sham advertisement on the Internet promoting the movie Wedding Crashers. The ad had been condemned by veterans organizations, and one Congressman, Rep. John Salazar of Colorado, introduced a bill in the House on Friday (the Stolen Valor Act) that would make it a federal crime to falsely claim to have earned a Purple Heart. In a statement, Salazar said, "If any movie-goers take the advice of the Wedding Crashers and try to use fake Purple Hearts to get girls, they may wind up picking up an FBI agent instead." Announcing the studio's decision to yank the ad from the movie's website, a spokesman for New Line said Monday, "We understand the sensitivity regarding the medals and did not intend to make light of their significance in any way."

#1) I can walk down to the local surplus store and buy a REAL purple heart any day of the week.

#2) If you're too stupid to recognize a PAPER PURPLE HEART then you're too stupid to know that you're having sex with a liar.

Guess what? He isn't going to call you in the morning.

To quote my girlfriend, "So that's where our hard earned tax money is going, to pay FBI agents to go undercover as hot chicks at weddings and bars to bust idiot guys?"

I rest my case.

Retardation Trial?

That's right. This trial is reatarded.

Virginia law, however, also requires that mental retardation be determined by age 18. Atkins' IQ was not tested as a youth.

Sorry, Charlie, you're gonna get the chair. Convenient to claim mental retardation when faced with the death penalty. Should've gone with an insanity plea. However, maybe therein lies his retardation. He's too retarded to know the difference between insanity and mental retardation. No, that's too far fetched.

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I Hate the Current State of United States Society

Woman sues video game manufacturer

Illinois bill targets mature video games

Laurence D. Paskowitz, the lawyer who filed the lawsuit on behalf of Cohen, said no parent would knowingly buy an adult-only video game for their children.

Apparently, however, a GRANDparent WOULD buy a mature rated video game for her 14-year-old grandson.

Cohen said in the suit that she bought the game in late 2004 for her grandson when it was rated "M" for mature, for players 17 and older.

I'm sorry, but if you're too stupid to understand that "players 17 and older" doesn't include your 14-year-old grandson, then you're too stupid to file a lawsuit, and you're too stupid to live in my country.

Stores also will be required to label their games with content ratings and to post signs explaining the rating system.

Isn't that what the ESRB already does for consumers? Isn't that what K-A, E, T, M and A-O already exist for? Are consumers just plain ignoring the information that's ALREADY POSTED ON THE FUCKING PACKAGING?

I prophesize a future where hammers will be labeled with "Warning: May be used to smash your fingers" and scissors will be labelled "Warning: May be used as a cutting device."

Stop dumbing down my peers. Stop ruining everything that's fun. Stop destroying a child's inherent ability and RIGHT to fantasize. Stop eliminating anything that isn't appropriate for 5-year-olds. Video games aren't only meant for children in the same way that all movies aren't meant for infants. I'm not going to take my 5-year-old to see The Devil's Rejects any more than I would allow said 5-year-old to play Grand Theft Auto. "Sorry, Tommy. That game is for grown ups."

I'm sorry. Sorry for people that are too old to understand that buying a video game for your grandson isn't the same as buying him a pack of baseball cards. Sorry that the world has become increasingly complex to the point that a high school education isn't enough to "get you by." Sorry that technology has created the need for intelligence and learning.

Wait, no I'm not. I'm not sorry you're a dumb fuck. I'm sorry you're still alive and didn't fall down and crack your head open while trying to put on your shoes.

That's a Lot of Water

"Cook used 10 million gallons of water last month." Read More >>